I Lost Weight. I Found Obsession.

Started my first diet because I saw a photo of myself next to my skinnier friends. Not for health. For shame. Seven years later, I can tell you the calories in everything. Almonds (7 each), half an apple (40), the guilt of birthday cake (immeasurable). Lost 30 pounds. Gained 40. Lost 25. Gained 35. Each cycle, the obsession grew stronger. I memorized restaurant menus before going out, calculating which salad would let me sleep without anxiety. The research is right—once you start, stopping feels impossible. Your brain rewires itself to see food as math, your body as a problem to solve. I'm still cycling. Still weighing myself twice daily. Still believing that the right number will finally make me worthy of taking up space. #WeightCycling #ScaleAnxiety #DietCulture #Health #Diet