My cat has me completely trained

Started thinking I was adopting a pet. Turns out I hired a tiny, furry life coach who works exclusively through psychological manipulation. My daily routine now revolves around his 4am breakfast demands, his very specific preference for the left side of my keyboard, and his need to supervise every Zoom call I take. He's trained me to open doors on command, provide lap warmth on demand, and somehow convinced me that buying him a $50 cat tree (which he ignores) was MY idea. The weirdest part? I genuinely believe he's disappointed in my life choices. Yesterday he stared at me for ten minutes straight while I ate cereal for dinner. Pretty sure he was judging my adulting skills. Anyone else living as their cat's personal assistant, or is it just me accepting my role as staff? #Pets #Cats #CatOwnerLife